Gays rule the world!

January 07, 2011

The new year has particularly good news for the queer community: within 20 years, we will rule the world! For by then we finally won't be an oppressed minority anymore, but will dominate the world - thanks to the UNESCO. 
That's at least what the Catholic bishop of Cordoba, Demetrio Fernandez, warned in his speech at a ceremony of the Holy Family. A UNESCO program is supposed to aim at "making half the world's population into homosexuals within 20 years". At schools, an "ideology of gender equality" would be taught according to which "people are no longer born as a man or woman, but will choose their sex according to their whims". And of course, the Catholic Church as an authoritarian collective system has a long-standing problem with individual free will.
But even if people chose their own sex, what does this have to do with homosexuality? A woman who "chooses" to be a man, and "decides" to love women, would be heterosexual. However, he was once a woman who now loves women. So, is he/she now a lesbian? Ah, that's very confusing, especially for an institution that preaches against everything that does not fit into their medieval morality. A few months ago, the Pope had already announced the establishment of a new authority in the Vatican in order to fight the increasing secularization. According to reliable sources, I know that worldwide the new Inquisitors are buying chicken in large quantities and burning it. Because we all know now that eating chicken makes you gay. 
After all, the UNESCO program for worldwide homosexualization is just another part of an overall strategy to stop the rapid growth of world population. Just as in China, homosexuals will soon receive amenities and privileges that will make the already exuberant gay life even more livable. 
But don't rejoice too soon. I'm afraid that the Bishop's claim is just yet another pathetic lie, and in 20 years we will still be a minority. Let's hope that we will proceed further on the path to enlightenment and reason. Luckily, bishops are not allowed to procreate!

additional entries:

Homos in the Hindu Kush

Stiff penises will be deported

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